On a very base level, we all know who we are. We know our names, our jobs (or school), the car we drive, our family members, and our significant other (if we have one).
But those superficial bits of knowledge about ourselves don’t amount to much more than facts you can put on your Insta profile.
When we ask, “do you know who you are?” we mean it on a deeper level. We mean going past the surface, drinking a nice glass of Rosé (or maybe two), and really getting to the bottom of your identity.
Many of our sisters out there end up without answers when they try to define themselves. Is that a bad thing? Should you be overly critical because your sense of self feels like it’s evaporated in a life of demands, responsibilities, and (potentially) traumas? Absolutely not.
It’s only natural to go into auto-pilot just to get through your day-to-day struggle. Still, that doesn’t mean you should give up on learning how to find yourself.
Why Do We Lose Ourselves?
Y’all know as women that we often have to work twice as hard, be three times as patient, and deal with about a million times more foolishness than everyone else. And we’re expected to do it with a smile. It’s the way of an old world that’s slowly changing.
Sure, these are more enlightened times–but it doesn’t make it that much easier. We still face the same obstacles we did decades ago. Many of us find ourselves facing all types of trauma and strife.
It could be the stress you’re facing at a job that doesn’t treat you right. Maybe it’s a relationship you had where your partner made you feel like less than yourself. It could even be an injury or an accident that’s caused you enough physical pain to turn your life on its head.
There are figurative landmines everywhere in life, waiting to be walked on. And when you do step on one, the main thing that gets blown up is your sense of self.
It’s Okay To Lose Your Sense Of Self
Self-blame does nobody any good. Yet, research shows that women are likelier than men to blame themselves for their self-perceived failures.
First, losing your sense of self isn’t a failure. It’s a reaction.
Second, there’s no blame or fault with self-identity (or lack thereof). There’s only your path to discovery (or rediscovery), the end of that path, and the constant evolution that comes with maintaining your sense of self.
Before you do anything more, forgive yourself–or at least don’t blame yourself. Then, it’s time to learn how to find yourself once more.
How To Find Yourself
There are many ways you start your journey of self-discovery. You could take up a hobby, ignite a new passion, go on a wild adventure, or embark on a career change. These are only a few suggestions–finding yourself can take many forms, and I’m Loving Me Wants to help you find what works for you.
Do you wake up each day fully aware that there’s more to the life you’re living? Do you need to heal the wounds of your past? Then, it’s time to stop being everything to everyone and FINALLY CHOOSE YOU!